Throughout the next few weeks, we will be sharing personal perspectives on the past year and a half throughout the COVID-19 pandemic from artists and those who work in the music industry.
This last year and a half has been… Difficult to say the least. I’m a very anxious and neurotic person by nature, so when everything started going down, it nearly broke me. To see everyone I know lose their jobs and careers in the music industry overnight left me with a lot trauma, especially since I was the only one out of my friends who still had a full time job that wasn’t affected. I absolutely developed a sense of survivors guilt in the aftermath. It’s hard to be grateful that you still have job when all of your friends are suffering. To boot, I am an extrovert, so not being able to see my friends and family and being locked inside, it was so fucking hard.
Over time though, I began to get used to this new reality. I found that working from home was perfect for me, and it increased my productivity tenfold. I also began to work on myself, as I realized I didn’t like who I was before all of this. I began to start to lose weight and try dieting for the first time ever. I had always struggled with my weight and I’m proud to say that I have lost 160+ pounds since I started dieting last June. I also truly fell back in love with my hobbies and interests. Working in the music industry definitely did cause my love for music to fade, but I was able reconnect with it during lockdown. Now my passion for it is stronger than ever. Ditto my love for video games, movies, and cars. I also finally came to terms with my autism during lockdown, something I had always hid out of fear of being judged. Being able to finally tell people about it and realizing that people love me for me helped so much and I’m happy I no longer have to try to be something I’m not.
Weirdly I’ve come to peace with everything over the last year and a half and for the future. Delta is… Not great, but I think I’m prepared if shit does go south this time around. I don’t think we will ever be in a lockdown as bad as March 2020 though. The vaccines work and are a lifesaver. Some shows may be cancelled, but it’s absolutely gonna be on a case by case basis and lie in the hands of the promoters/venues, as well as what area the shows are in and what the COVID rate situations are in that region. I’m confident enough in saying that live music is back though, even if it’s gonna be a messy process (God help me if I’m wrong). I’m just happy that my friends and loved ones can finally get back to doing what they love after a year and a half from hell for now. Live music means so much to so many people and after seeing it all stripped away, I’m just elated my friends can do what they are meant to do. I’m also happy that I am a more confident and stronger person than I was before. People just gotta do what they can to be safe and remember that Delta is still out there.
It’s been the roughest year and a half of my life, but I’m still here. I’m so much stronger than I’ve ever given myself credit for and I’m just happy that for me, the worst is over for now.